A Push in the Right Direction – Chapter 21 – emersli1!

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7 Minutes

Remus John Lupin felt the last of his pack bonds go with an exhausted fatalism.

It had actually taken longer than he expected.  Azkaban wasn’t kind to the guilty.  He couldn’t imagine being imprisoned there as an innocent.

Oh yes.  He knew Sirius had been innocent.  He knew when the grief and despair throbbed down the pack bond that Sirius had been the one to find them, not kill them.  And it had echoed with shock, so he couldn’t have been the one to betray them.

Remus had tried to contact Headmaster Dumbledore, thinking he would certainly take care of Sirius.  But his letters had been returned.  His floo calls unanswered.  At last, the owls wouldn’t even take his post, indicating that a personal block order had been placed.

Dumbledore couldn’t have made it any clearer.  

And then the bond to Peter had begun to rot.  That made it clear enough who the actual traitor was.  And then the bond to Harry had broken.

His pack was broken.  The Alphas were dead.  The Cub was dead.  One brother was a traitor and the other out of reach.  Remus learned to live with the pain, but Moony never did.  Each month was harder than the last, and now with Sirius gone…

Lupin sighed.  He had, through much scrimping and saving and a great deal of hard work, finally managed to save up the fees to seek a Level 2 apprenticeship in Defense.  Years of working as a security wizard or private guard were finally at an end.   

But now…

He would see how the next transformation went.  After that, well … if all his pack had moved on without him, maybe it was time to join them.

Lupin looked at the calendar.  Three weeks.  Then he’d make his decision.

Three weeks later, Remus surfaced from the worst transformation of his life.

He was face down on the floor of the basement room he rented, still chained to the far wall, so at least he hadn’t gotten out.  That was something, he supposed.

Painfully gathering himself he got to his feet and staggered to the box on top of the mantel where he kept the key to the chains.  Fumbling to open it, Lupin grabbed the key and undid the locks.  Winding the chains up into their trunk close to the wall, he looked at the destruction around him.

Moony had been inconsolable last night, and had apparently taken it out on everything he could reach.  Fortunately, that wasn’t much.  Remus was far too experienced at solo transformations by this point.

Stumbling across the room to the bed in the corner, Remus gratefully reached for the vial on the bedside table.  Downing it in one go, he felt the blessed relief from pain take over, numbing him to the physical pain.  Nothing could numb the emotional pain of his broken and missing bonds.

Sitting in despair on the edge of his bed, Remus stared into his future, and he didn’t want it.

Suddenly, a sound at the one high window.  Looking up, he saw an impatient owl pecking to get in.  Thinking he’d probably lost his latest job (employers didn’t like to keep people on who missed three days of work every twenty-eight) Remus sighed and dragged himself up off the bed.

Opening the window, the imperious owl looked as though it was judging him hard.

Remus didn’t have any owl treats, but he set out some water in a shallow bowl and grabbed a few biscuits and some leftover bacon.  He didn’t feel like eating breakfast, anyway, might as well give it to the owl.

Taking the letter, he gestured to his meager offerings, and the bird hopped over and began to drink.  The letter was heavy, and under all his grief and exhaustion a slight stir of curiosity began.

Opening the letter, Remus read through it once quickly … then went back over it more slowly.  His tired mind couldn’t really make sense of it all.  Looking across the room at the owl, he saw that the bird had finished his breakfast and settled into rest.  Taking that as permission for him to do the same, Lupin lay down on his bed.  He placed the letter on the bedside table beside the empty potion vial and laid his head on his pillow.

Tomorrow would be soon enough.

Waking the next morning, Remus rolled out of bed and sleep-walked into his bathroom.

Splashing his face with cool water, he tried to clear out the cobwebs left behind by a terrible transformation followed by a high-level pain potion.  Finishing his morning routine, he was surprised to walk out into his room to see the owl from yesterday perched on the back of the one chair Moony hadn’t broken to kindling.

Shrugging, Remus set out more water and shared his breakfast with the bird, the two of them eating in companionable silence.  That lasted until the food was gone.  At that point the bird apparently decided they had delayed long enough.

The owl flew over to the letter, abandoned on the bedside table, and perched above it, staring pointedly at the tired man sitting at the small dinette.  Sighing, Remus got up and went to pick up the letter.  Maybe it would make more sense now that he wasn’t exhausted and drugged.

Mr. Remus J. Lupin,

You have been recommended to me by a mutual acquaintance for a project I am attempting.

My name is Corvus Quinn and I am currently studying for my Level 1 Potions Mastery.  I have my final research project planned out, but I am also currently trying to get a mail-order potions business started while parenting three boys under the age of five.

As you can imagine, I’m a bit busy.

I need someone to manage the business side of things.  I have secured a space in Toulouse to act as a storage/packing space with an office for things like bills and accounting.  There is an apartment above it that would be available for living quarters.

That is the business aspect of this.

My research project is the development of a cure for lycanthropy.  I have been told you have a special interest in the condition.  I have also been told you are perhaps in the market for a Defense Master to oversee a Level 2 apprenticeship.  I do not know your particular area of interest in Defense, but if it is at all connected to runic warding it could be accommodated, and perhaps lead to a developmental partnership.

I would like the opportunity to discuss these matters with you.  I live in Ansalonga, Andorra and would be pleased to meet with you there, in Ordino, or in Toulouse at your convenience.  Contact details are below.

In regard to our mutual acquaintance, I would like to assure you I was with him at the end.  His last concern was for you, and his end was peaceful, and above all, free.

Corvus Quinn Balfour

Remus couldn’t think of anyone who might be considered an acquaintance who might know enough about him to recommend him to an aspiring Level 1 Potions Master.  There was a rather heavy-handed implication that the man knew of his werewolf status, and that reference at the end…

Remus Lupin had been a Gryffindor.  But the hat had dithered for almost five minutes between Gryffindor and Ravenclaw.  He wouldn’t say that the letter filled him with anything as positive as hope.  But it did fill him with something else.

Curiosity.

Rooting around on the table he referred to as his desk, Remus gathered writing implements.  Looking at the owl, still waiting for his response, he made up his mind.

Mr. Corvus Quinn,

I am not sure what mutual acquaintance we might have that would know of both my apprenticeship search and my special interest in lycanthropy.  Whoever they were, I’m glad they weren’t alone at the end.

Your informant was correct about my apprenticeship search.  I had not previously chosen a specialization, waiting instead to see who might respond before narrowing my focus too greatly.  Runic warding is intriguing, and certainly falls within both my interests and my skillset.

If it would be convenient for you, I could call on you next Monday at your home in Ansalonga.  I have never been to Andorra, and would no doubt enjoy the adventure.

If Monday will not work for you, please let me know.  Otherwise, I look forward to meeting with you.

Remus J. Lupin

Sealing the letter and offering it to the owl, Remus thought over his to-do list.

1. Resign his position.  One way or another he wouldn’t be returning.
2. Let his landlord know he would be leaving at the end of the week.
3. Make sure his good robes were clean.
4. Withdraw his property and funds and close his account with the Gnomes.

Maybe this would be something worth enduring for, or maybe not.  But for now, Remus was prepared to give it one more try.

Hopefully Moony would be too.

Remus looked out the window at the scenery as his bus chugged up the last stretch before the stop that would be the end of his line, one way or another.

Andorra was a beautiful country, with stretches of forest punctuated by small villages and communities.  Further up were ski resorts while the valleys boasted beautiful hikes and nature walks.  The country’s mining past was visible in spots, but it hadn’t decimated the landscape.

Feeling cautiously optimistic, Remus disembarked.